I broke the first rule of gang membership when I created a hip hop playlist of east coast and west coast rappers. I tucked my two youngest daughters into nap and danced around in my kitchen until I no longer had tears to wipe away.
I shimmied at counter’s bounty as I cut fresh-from-our-garden zucchini and thought
gimme some B.I.G., Black Sheep, love me some Snoop, Jurassic 5.
I backed it up around the table as I loaded local berries onto food dehydrator’s trays.
So far, the highlight of my week has been standing in street’s stillness in the humid evening of a sumer-come-late evening with sweet baby Olive slung on a hip, pointing up to a star scattered sky and listening to her first whisper moon.
The longest part of my week has come each morning and each bedtime’s tuck for the last six days where I break my firstborn’s heart. She begs and pleads to stay home to help care for her baby sister, her youngest best friend.
I wipe her tears, hold her Icelandic cheekbones and tell her the long first grade days ahead will become days she loves.
She loved it for school’s first two days. At permanence’s realization she turned away from the unfamiliar room, the unfamiliar classroom community and began pleading for me to homeschool her.
She’s been asking for second’s with my homeschool stories from my time on a wooden sloop adrift in the Bahamas.
I tell her gently that if we’re going to homeschool her, we’re going to do it not on one island, but on a sailboat sailing many islands and our home isn’t ready to sell and we don’t have a live aboard cruising sailboat…yet.
I’ll zip joy into her backpack, blow kisses of love and send notes of courage.
In this week’s Today’s Mama piece entitled Would-Be Twins, Totally Different I wrote about sending my daughter out in the world and how tough it has been, even though it’s only the first grade.
Would-Be Twins, Totally Different
When the school bell rings I want to hold on a bit tighter with my hugs, knowing I can’t hold my daughters in my arms forever. I want to know all about what made them laugh and know how their heart was lead to create each and every day. I want to know their wishes for tomorrow……[click HERE to read more]