weekending, {re}settling

forgive me, for it’s been a while
i’ve missed it here, in this space
with this glow of my computer screen
in the napa valley of california
i found family, intermittent wifi
on the highways of the west coast, i found conversations
& exhaustion when I was stretched out 
with laptop was plugged in
travels are like this:
present, connectedness 
beers by globe-light, s’mores by late-night fire
laughter of old tales into midnight,
early mornings with babes of our own, babes of our family
& the children of friends-like-family
i didn’t mean to be gone for so long from here,
but i also didn’t want to say i’d be traveling
for fear of my empty house
being so alone and, forbid, not-so-empty
i’m kinda paranoid like that
so, hello
i’m back.
we drove to California
a celebration of grandma’s 90th year
every minute of her party, her family weekend was perfect
hearts full of love, stories to share, pictures to edit
tears in the good-byes
we drove to Portland, OR
in a tall, historic home of old friends
long enough to remember our life
in a yellow house on the east side of the river
we drove off the ferry
just in time for our anniversary
nine years married, fourteen together
we went on a proper date
he showered, i put lipstick on
i planned homemade chocolate chip cookies with cold milk
on the beach, after dinner, near sunset
he planned dinner out, flowers and chocolate
believe me when i say this:
some wretched stomach bug and a migraine had plans for me
no, really
i’d gotten off my food restrictions and exercise plan while traveling:
migraines were excited about that.
when we married nine years ago, i known he was the one
to sit beside me all night
to hold a cold cloth to my head until sunrise
of course he’d say
in an anniversary it only matters we’re together and happily in love
as soon as i stood on two feet, betty came down with it
later, an evening massage sent me into wellness,
by saturday night we were all giggling again
made a last minute decision to pack up our meal,
dance by the sea
_MG_9339eat on a beach
hands in sand as dessert
the entire 1,801 mile trip
our girls longed for our beaches,
felt homesick for waves, sandcastles, driftwood.
i stayed up way too late
until luke got home from an outage,
we watched the shipping news
kevin spacey is awesome, so is the scenery

i know i say this all the time, 
but the book is so much better.  

into bed we slid
just as the youngest flung her feverish body between us.
so, a day spent at her side
holding her blond hair back
rubbing that spot on her back where she’s sure fairy wings will sprout any day.
i like being near, needed
holding her still-tiny hand
rubbing that spot between her eyebrows.
but her cries, her pout
hurt my heart.
here’s to tomorrow’s health,
tomorrow’s post
hoping for a beach day soon.  i mean,
who cares about still-unpacked suitcases.
i hope to see you a lot this week, especially for thrifty thursday.
joining amanda


  • Tracey says:

    Oh Sweetie, happy anniversary. I'm sorry you were so sick [migraine's are the worst, and stomach bugs..shudder]. And now the poor wee one, I hope she is better soon.
    I think it's great that you were able to attend a 90th birthday, that is awesome. Glad you and your loved ones are back at 'their' beach.

  • the shipping news is one of my fave books. ever. way high up in my top 10. the movie, pretty high up in the film adaptation of a book list. 'tis true.

    migraines and tummy bugs….grrrr. but you found beauty and love and celebrated your life nonetheless. you are my hero 🙂

  • ~ko says:

    What a journey my dear! The peaks and valleys…all of it. Hoping for health, rest and sandy toes this week for you.

  • swanski says:

    I haven't read that book but I own it! So onto the list it goes. Happy anniversary and I hope as you read this that everyone is healthy.

  • I'm like you and never announce a holiday until we are home, just a little paranoid. Sent my just well girl off to school after a whole week off sick and still coughing in the mornings. Glad you are back with your writing to read while enjoying my morning coffee, love the shipping news and must re read it. Hope you all feel well again soon.

  • I love that your girls were “homesick for waves.” what a beautiful sentiment….
    I hope you are feeling all better now.
    Poor sweetie! You just had a migraine last week no?
    Im planning to join you one way or another this thurs.
    off to read about your portlandia experience!

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